Diplomas for All

i283163839591050357._szw480h1280_Well, tomorrow is the day I get to report the non-progress I’ve been experiencing. I know I have said this a lot here lately, but I mean really? How much is it going to rain? For the love of God and all of my aching body parts let’s put an end to this unstable air PLEASE?

 

I have been fairly absent from the blogging scene lately. Between school ending and mother in law in the hospital and me feeling like the tin man needing several squeaks of oil, I’ve just been burnt out. Something I seriously don’t understand: why in the world do we need to have these grand graduations after every single school year? Why did I have to attend my 6-year-olds graduation, my 10-year-olds, and my 17-year-olds girlfriends all in one week? Hers I understand. Graduating high school is sort of a big deal, but the others are just part of life. Don’t get me wrong, I love seeing my kids be rewarded for doing good in school, but I didn’t have these graduations and all these goings on in my time and I think, I hope, that I turned out okay.

 

Maybe I’m old-fashioned, I don’t know for sure. But see, in my time passing school was something you were expected to do. Every. Single. Year. And if you did, then you did what you were supposed to the next grade up and if you didn’t then you got to try to get it right the next year in that same grade. I guess there’s not enough opportunity to build these little butter cups up in this day in age. We must give everyone a graduation and an award, just for participating. It’s sad really.

 

So now it’s summertime and there’s one GREAT thing about summertime and that is that we get to sleep in. I don’t have to get up and shuffle kids around to schools. I get to spend all day with these kids and trust me when I say this. I love them. I love them more than anything in this world. And still, I have to say those two sentences to myself several times a day to keep from hollering at them. They fight and argue and tattle tell ALL DAY LONG. And there’s a small period of time they’re being unusually quiet and liking each other for a moment I go in to check on them and they’ve made the biggest messes one could imagine. They can turn this house into a scene on hoarders in nothing flat. Which in turn I make it into a scene as well. But not on hoarders. On Snapped.

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Ain’t Nothin’ But a Chicken Wing

fowlplayWell, I haven’t posted to this thing because frankly, I have been busy. I have been busy with feeling like poo. I have been busy trying to motivate myself to get through the last few weeks of school. I have been busy warding off rashes of unknown causes. And on top of all of that, I have been desperately trying to find a work from home job that pays decently with no set hours and no video talking because I can’t stand the way I look. I don’t want any of the clutter that fills areas of my house to be visible to any potential employers. I don’t want to make another commitment I can not keep because my body throws me a big NOPE NOT TODAY signal. But I do need to work. I need to be able to afford my medicine and doctors appointments. I need to be able to buy small things I need but put off because I don’t have the money.

 

I have always lived paycheck to paycheck whether it be my paycheck or my husbands. And it never matters how big are small the check, we find a place to spend it all promptly. And we don’t have extravagant things so we aren’t the type to just blow money on things that aren’t necessary. Sure, we splurge every now and then, but nothing major.

 

It’s Memorial Day weekend and as I type this my husband is outside merrily playing with his newest addition to the family. One that my youngest son is super excited about too. CHICKENS!!!!! Yes, I said chickens, the feathered sort. The egg laying kind. Something I have expressed no desire to have and raise for several reasons which were probably all petty on my part so I won’t get into that. But bless him for just going ahead and getting them because it has kept them busy since yesterday and out of my hair for a little while. I hate that I feel that way. Continue reading

Fight Like a Mother…

5/15/2017

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I hope you all enjoyed your Mother’s Day Weekend as much as I did.  My husband and kids cooked me my favorite. Steak (medium rare) and a baked potato. What is even better, they cleaned the entire kitchen and put up the food afterward. I didn’t have to do a single thing. Not. One. Single. Thing. SCORE!! They could’ve fed me pig slop and I would’ve been okay with it as long as I didn’t have to make it or clean it. All I did all day is lay in bed and watch TV. I know, it sounds lazy, but it is what I wanted to do and I wanted to do so with no feeling that I was being pathetic on the inside. 

 

I think that is what we all want sometimes. We want to be granted the okay to be tired sometimes. We want to not feel like we carry the weight of the family on our shoulders. Even when our husbands seem to take over and try to help us, we still feel ashamed of ourselves. We, women, carry it all around with us. And even if just for a day, every now and then, we need to let that go. No price or value can be placed on that gift. 

Momlaundry

But why? Why do we feel that way? I know it is natural and regardless of how many men will deny it, we are just built that way. It is why we can be so moody at times. Even if we are being pampered and not having to maintain things around the house or even on vacation, there is some person or demon in the back of our heads saying, “you know you have to go wash those clothes now or it won’t get done”. And when we ignore that little voice, we feel as if we don’t stack up. We aren’t doing our job. It’s sexist, I know. But it is what we do. I believe we always will. We were built that way. 

 

I never got into the whole women’s march thing and this is the reason why. Call me traditional, but I’m okay with it. Annoying at times? YES! But I guess it is just the way I was raised. I’m a woman, hear me roar! Or better yet, don’t hear me. But one thing is for sure, you will NOTICE me and my actions. And I don’t have to march or wear a vagina on my head to achieve that. 

 

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4 Wheels

5/11/2017

 

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Manager… of Pain… and Wheels… and Such

 

Before I had answers, before I knew MCTD even existed, I hurt. I have hurt for a long time. But before I knew I had no idea that some of the things I experience aren’t just part of old-age. I knew that I seemed to suffer from pain more than others my age, but I still thought it would be something simple.

 

I used to speed skate in my younger years. That takes a toll on your body. Particularly when you’re also a clutz. I was a strong clutz, but that only meant that when I’d fall, it hurt worse. Because the part about skating I loved the most was speed. I wasn’t the best on my team, but I wasn’t at all the worst either. Skating ruined my knees and feet and claimed my left wrist when it was broken and I knew it wouldn’t be long before it was a constant nag.

Since my mid to late 20’s I have had pain in that wrist broken when my wheel hit the bubble gum of that skating rink floor. My knees have always been squeaky and would get stuck if I squatted in a certain way. You can hear them pop when I pry them back straight. It is a pain I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. It’s also very embarrassing. Because when it happens It is always a sharp, quick pain followed by an elaborate freak out on my part.

 

A few years ago we decided to get the kids and ourselves 4-Wheelers. It would be great family fun to go riding around the mud and enjoy each others company and get good and dirty and just take in the hot summer sun.  We knew we would be particularly rough with these machines so we combed through Facebook groups and Craigslist ads everywhere until we had finally found what each of us wanted for the lowest price we could get.

 

My choice was a Polaris with the big mud tires and a hitch and even some sort of lift. What I liked the most about it was that it was an automatic so I wouldn’t have to worry about using my foot or whatever to swap gears. For the kids, they too got Polaris automatics but one of them was a very old model and the other was newer than mine, but also much faster. Designed more for trails than mud I guess you would say.

 

I decided in an effort to be a responsible parent I should ride theirs to see just how fast it was. You know, how safe or unsafe is it? Did I buy the wrong kind for hard-headed, fearful of nothing, little boys?

 

A few laps around our land would prove that it was indeed too fast. In a field behind my husband’s grandmother’s home laid a metal baseball bat. I overthought the situation as usual and decided in the last second to swerve to avoid the bat being run over and popping up and causing severe damage to the boy’s new toy.

Good News:  The bat’s okay. More good News: The 4-wheeler was also okay.

 

THE BAD NEWS: I would require surgery to put me back together again.

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Rain Pain, Go Away!

5/6/2017

rainpainWhat is with this weather? Seriously!




I live in the south so usually by May I’m melting. It’s like 50 degrees in my house right now.  I’m seriously contemplating turning the heat on. The only thing keeping me from doing that is my knowledge of our bi-polar weather patterns.

If I put the heat on, I can hang up hope of sleeping in late tomorrow.

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I should probably warn you now… I’ve taken my Ambien. 


It doesn’t seem to be having an effect on me, but that’s just my sedated opinion.  I can’t sleep because I hurt. And the only thing that seems to take my mind off the hurt is being pestered by the wrinkles in my sheets or the shirt I am wearing. I feel like, “The Princess and the Pea”.

What’s even weirder to me, these wrinkles hurt.

Please pray for my mother-in-law



My mother in law went in for her surgery Monday. She had to have an aortic bypass. The doctors said she did great in surgery, but a few hours later she was right back in surgery trying to have a blood clot removed.

We visited her today and yesterday and called to check in a good bit. She’s not progressing like they would like to see her progress. I want to be with her more than I am, but I’ve got kids to take care of and this weather has brought on a flare that absolutely had to come straight out of satans closet.

They say May showers bring spring flowers. (Haha, after reviewing this post without Ambian I realize the saying is Spring Showers bring May flowers) I’ve never heard of it being 40 degrees in May. And I’m not too clear on what causes flares to be worse during off weather, but they most definitely are.

I Need Advice! I Need Suggestions!.

I am really busy with all that is going on in my little world right now. But I wondered if any of my viewers have any suggestions for natural supplements or essential oils or rubs or whatever that may help you to get through. I seriously feel like the bones in my body are bruised all over.

This Plaquenil isn’t working. I know it takes time, but shouldn’t it at least be tapering off some?